Eden Golan, last year's Israeli representative to Eurovision, was interviewed by Walla, which was published on Thursday, where the singer spoke on her fears while participating in the international music competition.
"After October 7, I didn’t sleep at night. We’re going through a really tough time. All the hostages, that’s a topic that doesn’t leave me indifferent for a moment. I also had dreams where I woke up in the middle of the night, because I’m being kidnapped and shot. I don’t even want to think about what all the hostages are going through. God willing, may they all come home soon.
"I can’t believe a year has passed. I’ll never digest it. It’s really a once-in-a-lifetime experience, especially in the year I was there. This year, for example, we pretty much know what to expect. But it was the first time after October 7, we were at the peak of the war, and no one knew what to expect, from death threats to the extreme booing, I didn’t expect. I don’t know how I stood through it. I’m a very strong person, I always have been. I grew up in Moscow, and I entered the show business at a very young age and matured very quickly. These are things that built me a thick skin. Without these past experiences, I don’t know if I would have been able to handle all that hate. It’s a lot about knowing your self-worth and what you bring.
"I represented something I love so much, and I was sure about the song. I did a lot of work on the performance and my singing. In the end, with all the weight on my shoulders and all the insane responsibility, I just chose to enjoy it and not let these thoughts get to my head. Somehow, I just stood through it. I don’t know how. Sometimes videos pop up from then, and I see that in the hall, they couldn’t hear me. I’m not ashamed to say that I’m very proud of myself for what I went through. It could leave a scar and deep trauma for a person. I turned it into my strength."
Take us to the first boo you received
"We perform with noise-canceling headphones, and I’m not supposed to hear what’s happening around me. I knew there would be boos, but I thought I wouldn’t hear anything. I thought I’d only hear the music and my voice singing, and that would cancel out all the noise around. So, in the first rehearsals with the audience, I got a pretty hard slap in the face because I realized that everything I had prepared in my head was not like that, and now I had to change my thinking to handle it, because I couldn’t let it affect me. I remember we got off the stage, and the dancers started crying. The whole delegation was crying, the PR manager was crying. It was hard.
"It's insulting. My mom told me, ‘I couldn’t breathe. I cried when I saw my daughter like this, she came just to sing.’ It hurt her that I had to experience that, and really, if I look at it rationally, what 20-year-old should go through something like that? Why? We came to make music, to sing, to have fun. Yes, there’s also the part where you represent the country, but no one should go through that. Anyway, I saw that everyone was crying. I somehow immediately collected myself.
"We turned it into a good thing. I remember the second rehearsal. I talked to myself, did a lot of self-work. I remember that in the second rehearsal, I got booed at the beginning. I breathed and told myself, ‘I don’t care, it doesn’t bother me.’ In the middle of the song, the boos got louder, and fire came out of me. I got off the stage and said, ‘I want them to boo me even more!’ It sparked so much power and fire in me, and I turned all that hate into my strength and love. That was the biggest switch that happened in me, that changed the entire experience. People ask me if I would do it again, with all the boos and hate. The answer is yes."
Regarding the overall Eurovision experience, not necessarily on stage. There was a lot of hostility and hate toward you. Were there moments that were really scary? Even to the point that you feared for your life?
"Of course. In Malmö, I already told myself I was letting go of the fear. I won’t deal with it in my head. There was insane security, and they knew what to do. I had eight bodyguards around me, helicopters, everything. I chose not to focus on it. But in Israel, before Eurovision, especially when there were death threats against me, saying they’d blow me up and make me a target, at some point my parents, who wanted me to fly, said, ‘Eden, we don’t know if it’s worth your life.’ It got to the point where I thought, ‘Wow, what if I don’t come back?’ I had images in my head of standing on stage, singing, and being shot.
"The mind imagines the worst. At Eurovision, everyone goes through checks, the hall is secure, but still, after so many threats I’ve received, after all the articles on TV and worldwide, the worst thoughts cross your mind. There were nights I slept less. And there, in Malmö, I told myself, I’m not dealing with the fear. I got rid of it from my head. I didn’t have those thoughts. I chose not to occupy myself with it."
Which representatives from other countries showed you sympathy and warmth, and which contestants were the most disgusting?
"Where do I begin? Out of 37 countries, I’d say maybe four were nice. Tali from Luxembourg, bless her, I’m in love with her, but she’s Israeli. She’s truly a soul and talented, and she wasn’t afraid of anything publicly. The representative from France told me backstage ‘What a number!’ and the representative from Germany was really sweet. That’s it for the most part."
And who was the most disgusting to you?
"You could argue whether it was the Irish, or the Greek, or the Dutch. Karma is a bitch! Oh, can I say that? Anyway, everything comes back. I truly believe in karma and energy. Against all the hate around, I came with only love. I believe it comes back, and I saw it come back, even from people who aren’t Israeli or Jewish from all over the world."
How did the competition look behind the scenes? Did people see you as an outcast, avoid you, and not talk to you?
"No one wanted to get close. There was also this one time I filmed a TikTok with the singer from Finland who sang ‘Cha Cha Cha.’ The video exploded, a lot of people saw it, and within seconds, his manager came into my room rudely while I was getting ready without knocking on the door. He just walked in and demanded that the video be removed from the networks. People didn’t want to be looked at differently, and even if they felt okay with us inside, they didn’t want to get a negative reaction. Especially then, at the peak of the war, if you said anything good about us, they could mark you, and that was it. I didn’t expect much. I was with myself, in a good environment with the delegation, the dancers, and all the team, who really supported me and were there for the right cause. I didn’t want to give my energy to anyone else, to waste time on hate and evil. I was in my bubble, and don’t touch me, thank you very much."
Is there something we don’t know about your Eurovision participation?
"I don’t remember if I said this, but they kicked us out of the artists’ area on the day of the final, told us to move rooms. They wanted to make it bad for us, and they actually moved us to an isolated place. They did us a favor. We got a huge room, isolated, without noise. I was happy. I always choose the good things."
Will Yuval Raphael be able to stand in front of loud boos? What advice did you give her?
"Of course. I talked to her, and at first, she had the same thought that she wouldn’t hear the boos through the headphones. I told her, be prepared. I saw that the hall this year is much smaller. I had 15,000 people; this time, it’s 6,000, so the intensity will be less. I really hope for her that it won’t come through the microphone like it did with me, because of the number of people, but she’s ready to deal with it, bless her. She’s so deserving, an amazing person, so talented, and she truly deserves to be on that stage."
"I’m shocked how Yuval, with no experience, is standing on stage and doing it. In short, Yuval is ready for this. I talked to her, gave her all the tips, do the rehearsals, and in the end, the most important thing is to enjoy it. Just give her heart and soul – and enjoy. Because in the end, if she doesn’t enjoy the moment, she’ll really regret it. I think that’s really the best advice: believe in yourself, and enjoy it."
Golan also noted her disappointment with the European Broadcasting Union allowing Palestinian flags in the competition hall. "I didn’t understand that. I thought it would be the opposite, that the EBU would introduce laws against all the trash from last year.
"I hope there will be a lot of Israeli flags. I also think because it’s Switzerland and not Malmö, which is a Muslim city, there will be ten times more Israelis. Please, Israelis, fly there and hold the flag, it’s so important now. You don’t understand, one of the best things was going on stage and seeing the Israeli flags, it just warmed my heart. There’s nothing like that feeling."
This year, you will present the points from Israel. Which reminds me that last year, the European Broadcasting Union prohibited the Israeli points presenter from wearing the yellow pin calling for the release of the hostages, as she had planned to do. Maybe you have an idea how to bypass that?
"I wish I could tell them they’re dealing with a very stubborn person, but unfortunately, the EBU are tough people. I want to believe that if they allowed Palestinian flags, they’ll allow a hostage pin.
Would you want to do a second go at Eurovision, like Ilanit, Izhar Cohen, and Dana International?
"I don’t like to rule anything out, never say never. You can’t know what will happen. Right now, I think it’s time for other people to show their strength and their art. In the next few years, I don’t think so, but you know, in the future, if there’s an offer, maybe.
"If I go back there, it’s only to win. Honestly, placement is the last thing I cared about. That we reached fifth place is something I can’t fathom. There were no points from the judges. Thanks to the audience, I rose to fifth place, which is abnormal to me. I’m so at peace with this place. But let’s see what happens in the future, you can’t know, I don’t rule anything out."
We’ve heard that a major international label reached out to you and had talks with you, but then decided not to sign you. People around you suspect that this is antisemitism or anti-Israel sentiment.
"I won’t get into names and details, but yes, there was a company where we actually got to the point of starting to work together, and suddenly they came back to us and said, 'Sorry, no one is willing to take on this project. I’m sorry, I can’t take it.' You have to understand, this is a Jewish person using the phrase 'Bring Them Home Now.' It’s an international company that works with big artists, many of whom are pro-Palestinian, and they’re afraid of ‘dirtying’ their name and losing the big artists.
"It’s sad for me to see this, especially from Jews in the industry, because in situations like these, you expect a Jewish person to support another Jew, but that’s the business; it’s smelly and disgusting. I don’t care. I’ll have many closed doors until one opens. So, it’s all good, I’m moving forward."
When they ask you about the Israeli government and difficult things happening on our side in interviews abroad, what do you answer?
"I don’t get into politics, okay? I don’t understand it. I don’t have anything to hide from those questions. I know what’s happening in our country, I know our truth, and I also know what’s happening abroad, and about people who are unaware and need to learn a bit and not believe everything they read on the internet.
"But I don’t get into politics, there are people whose job it is to deal with that. I’m here to make music. At the same time, I have this opportunity to represent our country, to give our voice as a country, and also to tell about the hostages we’re waiting for at home. That’s what I’m focused on."
